I've found that I can really tell the difference between what will last and what won't lately. Friendships, life goals, expectations, obsessions. I wouldn't call myself an optimist; I am far from it. However, I can always see a silver lining and as of late my silver lining has been shot down. All I want to do is stay in bed, curled up with my two comforters, and not have a care in the world. But no, reality has officially set in. I know it sounds like I'm just complaining about everything, but I'm not, I'm merely stating my feelings. I know what some of you might be thinking: "You're lucky compared to some, others have it much worse, don't complain" etcetcetc.
Don't ask me where I'm going with this speal, I don't know. If it stops making sense, sorry.
I'm just so sick of everything. I mean, really - does it look like I care?! I don't want to get caught up in drama or frivolous rumours; all I'm trying to do it get decent marks for university, not spend all my money and somehow get fit all at once. It may not seem like a lot but my god it's tiring. I'm so tired. I really don't want to get up in the mornings anymore, I don't want to go to school, and I sure as hell don't want to think or care about anything.
I don't know anymore. People tell me I look mad when I'm happy but my face is just like that... like, you don't think I notice I look pissed all the time when I'm not? Wow, thanks for the update, I'm so happy you've brought that to my attention. Oh, do I dress in a fancy manner? Well my god, I didn't know I put these clothes on this morning!
Sorry for all of this, I don't know why I'm putting it here and if you're annoyed from this well then read something else because honestly, I am not unicorns and faeries all the freakin time. Next post I'll try to sound happier. Or not say anything at all, I don't know.
(jacobs jacket, f carriere dress, spring heels)
I'm losing it guys, I really am....